Purple Dragonfly

“I am content with the red light”

From a Dragonfly Mom:

“There comes a point in life when you sit back and realize that none of the bullshit really matters… The pettiness, the drama. the he said/she said… The going out.. The so called friends…

I’m ashamed to say that it has taken this long for me to see this…. I am 29 years old and I just realized how precious life truly is…

I sit on my vinyl pullout consumed by the darkness…but there is a light shining in through a crack in the curtain.. it’s shining on J. There’s an overwhelming stillness in the room. A calmness that brings clarity. I’ve never felt so much peace in a moment…

Of course if we could be somewhere else, we would be, but here isn’t so bad.. This place has become our home…

Through the tears I write… And when I get lost I close my eyes and I see what truly matters…love… My love for peanut butter…for J

Life goes on outside of this place. Cars drive by, people laughing and carrying on. People celebrating and people enjoying the “finer things in life”… And my life has stopped…my daughters life has been put on hold… And people continue to go on… I guess this is the way it works. Surprisingly I don’t feel bitter or hateful. I am content with the red light that appeared almost 16 months ago.

That red light has brought more happiness…more joy…more love… It has taught me about family, true friends, heartache and unconditional love.. It has taught me passion, dignity and strength beyond measure. It has taught me that even when you think that you can’t keep going, you can…

We may be at a red light and the cars are all passing me by but I’m content just siting here… I’m content watching the world meander by because the ones that truly matter will pull over and wait.. But for tonight I’m content siting here on my vinyl pullout…sitting here in the darkness…sitting in the stillness…